This weekend I found myself in a double date type situation. It started off good but ended pretty shitty. I will spare you the details. My friend and I had just met these guys so they did not really know us. During the “tell me about yourself” segment of the evening I started talking about my blog.
I explained that on Chasing Joy I write about ways to have a happier life, specifically my pursuit of happiness and encouraging others to Chase Joy as well. One of the guys enjoyed being devils advocate and challenged me. He felt the problem with people was that they were quick to say “I’m happy” and use that as an excuse to not progress in life or achieve things. You would not think that a person could put a negative spin on Chasing Joy, but it’s possible.
I responded to the Challenge by explaining a little bit more of my philosophy on happiness and Chasing Joy. My approach to happiness has several components.
- Optimism – For me, optimism comes from spiritual practice. Believing in something greater than myself, that has my best interest in mind allows me to approach situations that are not good with a sense of optimism and faith that this too shall pass. That things can and will get better. For me that “something greater than myself” is God / Jesus (I highly recommend 🙂
- Gratitude – It is very difficult to be both angry or sad and grateful. I find counting my blessings to be a good stress reliever.
- Trying New Things – I know I develop a lot of melancholy feelings or negative thoughts when I have too much time to think. When my mind is not occupied with positive things negative things find their way in. That is the true meaning of the saying “an idle mind is the devil’s workshop”. Trying new things, learning, and having positive experiences keeps you focused in a positive direction.
- Setting Goals – There is a reason I do a Facebook and Twitter post each week, with the hashtag #MakeitHappenMonday, asking people what their goals are for the week. When we accomplish goals, big or small goals, there comes a sense of accomplishment and achievement. We feel good about ourselves and proud for making progress. These are all positive feelings that improve our satisfaction with life and increase our feelings of Joy.
- Helping Others – There are two benefits to helping others. When you are focused on doing something for someone else it can be a great distraction and give you a little time out from worrying about your own problems. The second benefit, similar to achieving a goal, is the sense of accomplishment you feel when you help someone else solve a problem or make an accomplishment. The only caution is to make sure that you are helping for the sake of helping and not for some type of reward from the other person. While being thanked is a great bonus if you are helping someone only for the recognition you will not feel a sense of accomplishment or joy if that thank you does not come. You benefit when you help just for the sake of helping.
Well I'm sorry that your date did not go well, but with regards to your philosophy on Chasing Joy, I am totally on board with that. I like to try to set daily goals for myself. I feel like you should have great goals. Pray over those goals and take baby steps each day towards achieving those goals. And bloom where you are planted. Shine right where you are! Very good post.
JaniceH
Sorry to hear it wasn't a happy evening, but it's good to know these things early on.
I think your happy philosophies rock. 🙂
Thank you for linking up to Super Sunday Sync. I am your latest Facebook follower. 🙂
Am I the only one that wants to hear the details of the not so good date?? Hahaha.
Anyway, You always read my blog and have been slacking on yours, even though I follow you both on Facebook and twitter. This was the PERFECT post to get me back into the swing of things. I enjoyed reading this post, very inspirational. Especially the "something greater than myself" I 100% agree on that!