Lately I have been doing some traveling. My most recent trip was to San Diego and it was… well, I don’t really know what to call it. Unfortunately, I did not find Joy in San Diego. I’ve never been much of a traveler. Don’t get me wrong I like to see new things and what no but I don’t have travel in my blood like some of my friends and family members. It is probably mostly related to my fear of flying. Luckily I have embraced the joy of Xanax and have a lot less trouble getting on planes these days. So in the last three months I have been to Las Vegas, Ft. Lauderdale, Detroit, and San Diego.
Mostly I have been traveling because I want to take advantage of the freedom that I am experiencing right now. I could not travel the last few years when my mom was sick. Also, I know that when I am blessed to become a mom I won’t be able to just get up and go. Despite trying to take advantage of my freedom and my new love affair with Xanax (don’t worry I only take it to fly) Philly to San Diego is a big flight for me. For me to go to the west coast I really need to be inspired. And I was.
If you want to see hear about my Las Vegas trip check out this post on Las Vegas in your 30s. You can also check out my Facebook and Instagram if you want to see pictures from Ft. Lauderdale and Detroit. This post is about my last trip and how I did not find Joy in San Diego.
Well the city of San Diego was pretty great. It was beautiful. The weather was nice. I liked the palm trees. I got to see the kissing statue and the Pacific Ocean. It was a neat greenish color. I stayed in the Gaslamp area near the cool restaurants. I also saw more skateboarders there than I have in my entire life. So, I know you are wondering what the problem was. Well I went there to see a boy. A boy that I like. A boy that it turns out did not like me back. It sucks! 🙁
So the trip was pretty rough on me emotionally. But I’m glad I went. I went there for two main reasons. I wanted to see if I really liked this boy ( I did) and I didn’t want to look back on this time in my life and wonder what would have happened If I had taken the trip. They say most people regret the things they didn’t do more than the things they actually did do. I did not want to regret not taking the chance. I wanted to feel brave and I wanted to be rewarded for my bravery.
Well that’s not what happened. Life is not a Hallmark movie and taking chances and bravery is not always rewarded. But I did get the answers that I was looking for. I will get over my bruised feelings and wait on my Mr. Joy Chasers. But I won’t have regrets or wonder over any what ifs. I still get to feel brave and proud of myself for taking the chance even though I did not not find Joy in San Diego. So be brave and take risks anyway.
Have you ever taken a chance and have it not go your way? How did you get over it? Have you been to San Diego? Did you see the kissing statue? How would you describe the color of the water?
Wait!!! I need the tea!!! Where did you meet this “boy”? How did it develop to the point you chucked deuces to your fear of flying to go see him? You found answers to your questions, but what were you questions?? And why didn’t it work out?
First of all, thank you for sharing your story of courage and bravery. Fear of flying is one thing, and then to not have something turn out the way you hope, is another. Congrats on “doing it afraid” and living life with no regrets. I think more of us should strive to do just that. Love your new site BTW 🙂
I love the bravery and the transparency. You will look. Back on this when you find that particular “joy” and appreciate this part of the process of finding it. Thank you for sharing. I met a boy who came to see me from atl to Cleveland in the days of MySpace (smh) and I had to send him back almost immediately he got on my nerves so bad. But I, like you, felt really brave for taking the chance. Although nowadays it’s really scary. Again, it’ll be all good! ❤️?❤️
It’s great to be able to live life with no regrets. You’ll never look back and wonder “what if?” Before becomming a mom, there were some places I would’ve loved to visit–thanks for letting me live vicariously through your travels!
I’ve heard a lot about San Diego from ex-workers and it was good reviews. I have never been but like you I’m venturing out these days so I might add this to my list. When I first started flying I used Dramamine and it made me sick. I now just get on the plane and go to sleep and it works for me. Taking off was the worst for me. Thanks for sharing!
hey! I’m sorry the trip was not was you expected or the guy either. 1) At least you went to San Diego. 2) Good thing Mr. Wrong has moved out of the way for Mr. right.
I’ve never been to San Diego. It sucks that this place is now attached to an emotional disappointment for you. Maybe you’ll meet someone one of these days who will turn it around. The husband and I love to travel. We even bring our daughter.
I have anxiety and it tries to get the best of me. Knowing that I try to say yes to things that scare me. Things don’t always work out the way I would like them to but at least I tried it. Saying yes has also opened some amazing doors for me.
I’m doing more flying by the seat of my pants these days and it feels good.
Awww, well hey.. You at least made a visit and traveled. I’ve never been to San Diego before. And yes, when you have babies you cannot just go anymore.. Oh do I miss the times I can just book a flight and I was off to NY for a few days.. Got kids, married, and work.. =(
I’m proud of you for going, girlie. And at least now you won’t have the “what ifs” in the back of your mind.
I’ve never been to San Diego myself but I think its great that you decided to go and face something that a lot of people probably would have just passed up and lived with the what ifs of going or not going. I personally have passed up a potential guy who lived in another state, my issue is with trust though. I think at the end of the day you still found joy because you were able to experience a beautiful city and even though the guy didn’t work out your still going strong. I definitely have realized myself that looking for Joy within a man, is a hopeless endeavor, instead I want to find joy within myself and God, and one day when Mr. Right does come, it will just be an added bonus. Don’t let anyone take away your joy 🙂
I took a chance on a man I was having an on-and-off again relationship with in Indiana (I had met him in the Bay area, and I live in Los Angeles). Before I went to Indianapolis to visit him he had said a number of things to me that got me thinking he was very serious about us. Such as that he was considering spending the rest of his life with me, and have my baby. He also said it would be difficult because I had just turned 40 (he’s 35), and for the first time I suddenly realized that I actually do want to be a mom after all. The trip had it’s stressful moments, but toward the end I felt like we were more in sync, and he seemed to be becoming attached to me as well, but after I got back to Calfornia he dumped me. I am now looking to find out if it’s even possible for me to get pregnant, but seeing as I am single I will have to be a single mother by choice. That’s what led me to this blog, actually.
WOW! Thanks for sharing this experience with us. That took guts and I am sure it will help someone. I’m also happy that you are free enough to travel when and where you like.
Don’t change who you are . Very brave and I like your confidence. Enjoy yourself now because your right, when the baby comes it’s all on hold.
I’ve been to San Diego as a child but I don’t remember much about it. However, I think it’s good that you went because you may have had regrets about it later. Plus, it let you to the truth and that’s what matters most.
You are so brave to put yourself out there like that! But I am so glad that you are doing new things and traveling!
I’m glad you were brave. At least now you know. I must say, I enjoyed my trip to San Diego. I think under different circumstances you might like the town again. I really loved the Palm trees too!!
I loved the beaches too.
Here is a hug for you. xoxoxo
I enjoy being there not getting there (any travel locale).
Never fear, you can say you tried it. Nothing beats a failure but a try (boy/travel). Don’t feel too down about any of it. You are a wonderful young lady. I’m hanging in there and rooting for your success in life.
I’ve been to San Diego a bunch of times for work. I personally love it. The weather is perfect there. I would also visit La Jolla when I was there…very picturesque.
I took a chance on telling a boy that I was dating, who I had been into for awhile before we even started dating, that I loved him, and he said in return, “It feels good when you say that”. And for like a year and a half of dating after that, he never fell in love with me. We both stayed because we wanted it to work out. But no one deserves to be where they don’t love, or where they don’t love, so it ended after too long, and now we are both happy with the people we took chances on later. And I am glad I took the chance of telling my ex what I felt, because now I know what it feels like to have the real thing because I know what the real thing wasn’t. I love your hope and your heart and your guts.
Great blog entry! It shows your willingness to take risk in order to find the joy that you truly want. This entry is encouraging and inspiring may we all feel so free to chase Joy too!