Oh boy! What have I done! These were my thoughts yesterday as I was leaving church. Yes, I have still been attending Epic each week and No I was not feeling guilty over some misdeed that I’d committed that was discussed in church. My feelings of anxiety were the results of me writing down #550 on my connection card.
The connection card is given out in the program each week. On it you can update your contact info, submit a prayer request, and, as was the case this week, sign up for a life group. A life group is basically a social group with members of the church who will meet up during the week for prayer, discussion, games, etc…. This week the sign up for life groups started and I joined life group #550 by writing it on my connection card.
Now I’m super nervous. For the last 20 plus years I have had an aversion to church in general. In the past when attending services I have felt uncomfortable, guilty, not good enough, and all sort of other less than joyful emotions. I have been enjoying Epic largely because I have felt none of those emotions (plus we have taken selfies and even used hashtags, both appealing to bloggers). I like this church! This is a new feeling for me.
It is a feeling of excitement! However I also have feelings of fear. Excitement over being able to enjoy communal worship. My fears include thoughts of how long will this last. Will something happen that will cause me to feel those negative feelings again??? It is with this mix of feelings that I have joined a life group. I want to get to know some of the members of this church that I like. But I am super afraid that as I get more involved something will happen that brings those negative feelings that I normally have at church back. My other fear is that I wont be “churchy” enough and not fit in with these people.
I joined the life group for a few reasons. 1. Like I mentioned above I’d like to get to know the people at Epic better. 2. I’d like to make new friends in general. 3. Maybe there will be a cute single Christian guy there. 4. To have a more active social life. Really, wanting to have a more active social life and making new friends are my main reasons for joining. Learning about the people at the church is a given. Possibly meeting a guy would be a bonus. I will focus on these reasons over the next couple of weeks, instead of my fears, as I wait for the start of my life group.
A little about life group #550. It meet’s bi-weekly at 7PM on Thursdays. I largely picked this group because the day and time worked with my schedule. The title of the group is Can I Have and Do it All Please? In reading the group info more closely in writing this post I realize this is a Women’s group. Ha! So very unlikely I’d meet a cute guy there LOL. The groups start in mid February. I will let you all know how I like it.
Have you ever joined a group at your church? What made you join and was it a positive experience?
I go back and forth on liking church groups. I like the idea of them, but I never quite feel like I belong when I'm there. I've met a few people that I really like, but being involved in a group of people bigger than 10 that I don't know is very overwhelming for me. I've been considering writing a post about religion for a while, I just need to pull the trigger on it. I've got lots of thoughts on being religious vs. not being religious vs. feeling religious vs. not feeling religious – and it's amazing how they don't always go together how you think they would.
I'd love to read your post Chrystina. You are right there is a lot of difference between how we might describe our relationship with organized religion vs. how we actually feel. I have always thought of myself as more spiritual than religious.
I love your honesty here! My church is a medium sized church with s small church feel. It's because of the groups it's that way. I love the connections I've made and people who have become friends as a result of being a part of different groups. I think the thing to remember in dealing with church and the people in it, is that they are people first. We have to extend grace and mercy and love. We are all on a journey to trying to be better but we all have our ways and things about us that we are working on… And who knows you may bump into a good cute guy in the hallway…
I love your honesty here! My church is a medium sized church with s small church feel. It's because of the groups it's that way. I love the connections I've made and people who have become friends as a result of being a part of different groups. I think the thing to remember in dealing with church and the people in it, is that they are people first. We have to extend grace and mercy and love. We are all on a journey to trying to be better but we all have our ways and things about us that we are working on… And who knows you may bump into a good cute guy in the hallway…
You are right. Churches are made up of individuals. I will remember that. I'll also remember to keep an eye out for cute guys in the hallway 🙂
Yes, there's joy in Life groups. As people we are designed to be social. That being said as long as you are in a group setting there's bound to be hurt and disappointment, think of work, school, and family meaning church is no exception. That however shouldn't stop you from joining a group. I know from personal experience that Life groups are of great benefit to you but more importantly to others and Jesus. At the end of the day it's about Jesus and others. I currently lead a group myself and I know I'm changing lives mine included because I choose to see the awesome people in the group for who they are. I'm glad you've joined a church and finally a group. Don't let past experiences stop you from sharing yourself in a church setting, you have a lot to offer and you might find someone to keep accountable on your spiritual life and other goals.
Plus I learnt interacting with others takes away the crowded loneliness that occurs in communal worship. Think also about serving in the church on Sundays I know a few people who met their spouses that way.
Can't wait to hear your feedback.
Thanks for the encouragement Sammyjoe. I will let you know how it goes sometime next month.