A couple weeks ago I was reading the fitness and weight loss blog posts of Phit-N-Phat. One of the posts was talking about how when you are watching what you eat and say “I can’t have” something it almost automatically makes people what you to have it. They are not intending to be food pushers and are often not aware that they may be pressuring you to go off your plan. The word can’t implies you are being deprived and we don’t want our friends to be deprived, right? So as soon as you say “I cant have dessert” people immediately say things like can’t you have a little piece, you can have some if you work it off, etc… Your friends don’t want you to be left out or miss out on what they are experiencing. Conversely the post said if you say “I don’t eat sugar”, “I don’t eat fried foods”, etc… people usually say OK and all those helpful suggestions on how you could still indulge stop.
Funny how powerful words are. The simple switch from “can’t” to “don’t” also brings about a completely different emotion. Often the don’t has a negative connotation. But it does not have to. Sometimes the word don’t can be strong and purposeful. For example when I say I can’t go over my budget I automatically think of all of the things I want but cannot buy. However when I say I don’t go over my budget I feel strong, in control, and determined.
I think it is time I embrace the word don’t.
- I don’t have to please everyone!
- I don’t need to make other people’s happiness a higher priority than my own!
- I don’t take advantage of other peoples insecurities or weaknesses!
- I don’t go a single day without praying!
- I don’t doubt my own intelligence!
- I don’t do things that will hurt me!
- I don’t expect to be perfect!
- I don’t hate anyone!
- I don’t delight in the misfortune of others!
- I don’t accept a life without Joy!
- I don’t need everyone to like me!
- I don’t give up on myself or my dreams!
I have those dont’s down. Here are a few dont’s that I need to adopt:
- I don’t overeat!
- I don’t eat to mask my emotions!
- I don’t let other people’s decisions stress me!
- I don’t worry about things I can’t control!
- I don’t engage in negative self-talk!
- I don’t doubt myself!
- I don’t over analyze the past!
- I don’t do things just because it is expected!
What are some of you dont’s? What dont’s do you need to adopt?
These are such powerful dont's! I feel sometimes I need a reminder on how to live life and simple lists such as this can be a wonderful reminder on what is really most important. "Don't" is the same as the word "No" – totally appropriate at times! Thanks for sharing the list!
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Our words have power. When I say I can't, the choice is made for me, I have no control. When I say I don't, I make a choice, I am in control, I have the power. I chose to be powerful.
I like that, I don't instead of I can't. Who knew a minor switch in what word you use, does have such a strong impact. I can totally relate to your list! I may have to try this tonight when I work on my affirmations 🙂
This is great! I firmly believe that we all need to make a like of "Don'ts" for our lives. -Even making copies and placing them all over as a reminder of who we are, our values and our beliefs. It will ensure that we stay on course. Thanks for sharing! 🙂
Love this piece, what a difference a word makes. Mine is the I don't have to please everyone, and I don't have to be liked by everyone. That took a long time coming.
My one to overcome is I don't doubt myself too 🙂