Bad things happen. They happen a lot. Sometimes life just sucks. We get sick. We lose our jobs. We trust the wrong people. Our cars die on us. Our loved ones let us down. I could go on and on. These things happen all the time. When we are in the midst of these struggles the last thing we are feeling or thinking about is Joy.
One thing that helps me the most during those times when things just suck is to really focus on the things that I CAN control. The feeling of helplessness that comes along when these sucky things happen only add to our negative feelings. Taking the time to concentrate on those things that are within our control helps us to feel less helpless.
When those unfortunate times, when life just sucks, arise I work really hard to focus on the following areas that are within my control.
- What I eat. Sometimes I have chosen to have comfort foods that might not have been healthy but have been comforting. I’m trying to work on choosing to eat things that make me healthier as that is equally my choice. A glass of wine or other alcoholic beverage is often a good choice too in moderation. The idea is to be conscious of the fact that what goes in your mouth is something that you have a lot if not complete control over.
- What I do with my body. To exercise or not exercise. It may sound weird but I kind of understand why men in prison exercise a lot. Besides the obvious self protective reasons, it is something they have control over in an extremely controlled environment. They can’t come and go as they please but they can do as many sit-ups and pushups as they want. Also accomplishing a fitness goal is also a nice mood enhancer.
- Who I talk to. Often when sucky things happen we need someone to vent to. That person can be a friend, therapist, spiritual advisor, or anyone else you trust. But you don’t have to tell everyone everything that is going on with you. You can reveal info on a need to know basis to those who need to know.
- Laughter. This one is not so obvious, but we have a lot of control over what we laugh at. Especially in the day of the internet a good laugh is only a few keystrokes away. All of our senses of humor are different. You know what you find funny. Whether or not you make time to humor yourself is definitely within your control.
- My environment. You may not be able to control everything about your environment but you can control the cleanliness of it. You can add little things to it that make you smile.
These are just a few things to focus on when life turns sucky. Which of the above areas do you tend to focus on when life just sucks???
Finding moments of joy and laughter are so important when having an off day. We have to make the conscious decision to look for those moments though.
This is absolutely a great tips. I really love to focus in life and its nice to feeling that you have laugh
These are some great tips! I've heard a lot of people say that it's wrong to have a comfort food but I don't think it is. Sometimes eating a nice greasy hamburger from McDonald's will satisfy us when there really wasn't much that could. No harm done and a bad mood avoided. 🙂
Love this and I know the feeling all to well. Great tips, I'm going to share.
This is a very smart, Zen-like post!
There is a magic in listing 5 things – sort of like a slang saying you can do when the going gets tough: "give me 5!"
It's always great to find other things to focus on when things aren't going so well. This is a great reminder. I sometimes forget that and focus all too well on the bad. – Jeanine
You have some great points here. I often find that when I'm stressed I try to focus on certain aspects of my life, just like you mentioned above. Of course I don't always make the best choices (food) but I'm working on it!
This is all so true. Doesn't it all come down to quality? The quality of food you eat, the quality of the people we surround ourselves with? Sucky stuff does happen but it can be weathered based on the mental and physical shape we are in, and those in our support system.
I like your positive suggestions, especially the ones about laughter and exercise since both always work for me. I also like to listen to music, talk to close friends and indulge in a glass of wine.
It can be so tough when life throws things at you that you just can't control. This is a great reminder we can still affect our mood and our life.
I've found that changing my environment can make a huge difference in how I am feeling! Prevent just picking up a little bit of stuff I have let clutter up my space.
This is a great post. I try to stay positive when life sucks and I focus on talking to and surrounding myself with people that support me.
I try to laugh as much as possible in general. It keeps me happy 🙂
Prayer, laughter, exercise, shifting my focus and a bit of retail therapy all help me when I'm in a funk. This is a great list.
Laughter is certainly good for the soul. I also love retail therapy, I'm not talking going crazy or anything but something new even if its small helps.
Awesome post! When things aren't going my way, I try to bring my focus back to God, and start counting my blessings, and knowing He'll bring me through whatever situation I'm in. I also to a mix of all of your tips. 🙂
This is such a great reminder to stay focused on those things that actually bring us joy. We so easily forget that there is no productivity in worrying. Thanks for the reminder…I'm about to go do some push ups 🙂
Great advice. Who I talk to is a big one for me. I make sure I share with the right peeps. I need people who will pray with me and for me!
This is awesome! I love focusing on the positive everyday instead of the negative.
Yeah, I think when everything sucks, going for a run makes it all seem exponentially better.
Great advice. I turn to comfort foods too often. I agree in venting but to the right person. And exercise is great for stress!
Good tips. Working out definitely helps switch the mood up. Just hard for me because it's not my most favorite thing to do.
Laughing…if I can't laugh I will cry. My life is so bad that I it's the only thing that keeps me going. I can't sit down and think about it I just roll with whatever life throws me and learn from it.
You have a few good tips. It all boils down to switching your attention from the negative points that are bringing your down to positive ones. Watch a comedy, look at pictures of your loved ones, feel gratitude for what you do have . . .
Thanks for sharing. I needed a reminder. Have a wonderful week, Darlene
Great post. You've included all of my trigger points.