An interesting and kind of annoying thing has happened to me over the last few years. I have become sappy. I find myself fighting back tears all the time. OK maybe not all the time but way more than I used to. I don’t remember crying a lot as a kid. I remember crying a few times as a teen. At high school graduation, when my dad suggested I’d not be able to buy a lottery ticket on my 18th birthday because I did not have ID (talk about overreacting) when my aunt passed a way and over a few boys not being interested in me.
In my early twenties not too many tears were shed. But enter late twenties early thirties and I’m just a weeping wuss. I’ve always been the type to cry if others were crying but now it seems like I cry at books, TV shows, commercials, good stories sad stories, memories, accomplishments and everything else. I’ve cried work, at home, at church and in the car. It’s ridiculous!!!
I’m really good at hiding it though. I don’t think most people have realized how often I cry. If you have just pretend you haven’t there’s no need to talk about. That would likely lead only to more annoying tears. My best stop tears now technique is the quick gulp of water, soda or whatever other beverage is handy. Works like a charm in most cases.
But don’t feel bad, like I said the tears are not always sad even if they are annoying. A happy thought is just as likely to bring on the water works.
Recently I read something that has made me feel much better about my sniffling. For the past few months I have been reading Joyce Meyer’s book Living Beyond Your Feelings that was given to me by a friend on my last birthday. In the section Handling Loss Joyce talks about crying. She talks about how the tears released in response to an emotional trigger contain different hormones then say the tears released when you get something in your eye, peel an onion, or have an allergy attack. The hormones in the crying tears are related to the release of stress. The stress hormones that build up in the body can be released when you cry. So now I don’t feel so bad about the tears. With each drop I am releasing a little stress.
So that makes me wonder is my life more stressed than I was when I was younger??? Maybe a little. But I also think it has more to do with I just don’t have the energy to try and hide my emotions any more. It is just too hard and not worth the trouble. That energy is better spent building honest relationships and Chasing Joy.
Now with that being said I still stand by my no crying at work rule. But, I know that’s not always possible so go for the gulping water technique first then head for the bathroom stall. Shed a few to release the stress then put your game face back on and head out.
So, next time you are trying to fight back tears maybe you should let them flow. We all know stress kept in can be harmful. Maybe the stress released in your tears can be good for your health. Maybe a few tears shed now means grasping Joy sooner than later.
Do you remember the last time you cried? Did you feel better or calmer after?
I cry a lot – probably more than the average person, but it's one of my go-to emotions whenever I get mad, sad, or happy! I think it's important to feel your feelings, so I don't overthink it 🙂
-Sarah
http://www.sweetandsavorylife.com
http://www.facebook.com/sweetandsavorylife
I'm pretty good about holding back my tears in public but they can flow super easy at home
I kind of avoid crying at all cost. I guess after years of crying nearly everyday I've finally realize that I have a ton to smile about. When I do cry it's sudden and necessary. Great stress reliever and one heck of a sleeping pill. Happy SITS day!
I cry all the time! Just last week I was trying to give someone a compliment and I started sniffling. The only time it upsets when is when I am angry and I cry. Then I feel like I can't get my point across.
Crying is a beautiful and needed thing to do… Visiting from SITS. LOVE your blog!!! 🙂
Me too girl. I NEVER cried in my 20's, but now that I'm in my 30's, I'm a big 'ol mess. Maybe these are our crying years. lol. Visiting from SITS. Your writing style is beautiful. Keep doing what you do 🙂
If I want a good cry, I steal away to the shower, turn on the hot water and let the tears flow. I always feel better! Happy SITS Day!
Crying is cleansing, trust and believe!!! There is nothing wrong with it. I will cry, sometimes just sitting and thinking about something from my past, then I smile and come back to present day. Happy SITS Day, love your blog.
Oh my gosh, this has happened to me too! I was never a crier when I was younger but now, the slightest thing will set me off! Even commercials and I used to make fun of my friends who cried during commercials! But this part I think rings true: "But I also think it has more to do with I just don't have the energy to try and hide my emotions any more. It is just too hard and not worth the trouble." Happy Happy SITS Day! Enjoy the day!
Crying is a signal and you shouldn't ignore it which you learned from the book your friend gave you. Don't you love how the things you need are always there? I cry at commercials, movies, stories. Be glad that you do. It shows how human you are. Crying at work, though, definitely can be a problem. Enjoy your SITS Day. You wrote a nice well-paced blog.
Because of an abusive situation, I had shut my emotions off for years. I just didn't cry because it would show vulnerability. Then I couldn't cry because my self-defenses were too strong. I learned to cry again in therapy. I learned to let myself feel again. It was rough at first, but now I'm grateful. Those tears can be so healing. But I don't think I'd want to cry at work. I've never heard of the gulp of water trick. I'll have to give that a try next time the tears are inconvenient. Thanks.
I'm glad you're getting to a place where you can appreciate your tears more.
Ah! I've become a crier, too. Most of the time they are happy tears, watching my son play, hearing good news for a friend who needed it. I think you are right that it's not so much that I need to cry more than I did when I was younger. I've just reached a spot where I don't worry about keeping it in anymore! Awesome, awesome post, lady!
Stopping by from SITS on your very special SITS Day,
Tori
I always feel better after a good cry. And I cry a LOT. Happy/sad/overwhelmed/frustrated/mad during romance novels at work while driving listening to music – it doesn't matter. I've accepted it as just part of my life. My coworkers have taken to making fun of me for it – out of love though, so I'll take it.
I'm the world's EASIEST crier. I hate that about myself, but what can I do? Great post!
Happened to me this AM on the way to sesame place, a great prospective day (and eventual awesome day), my two year old napping in the backseat, husband singing along to christmas carols on the radio and me looking out the window weeping about something that happened two days ago that wasn't even a big deal or relevant to the current situation. Luckily I quickly pulled out eyedrops from my purse and blamed it on that. I loathe that I feel the need to hide it. Salt and pepper hair on a man is sexy at our age, emotionally affluent (as I like to call us) women are considered hot messes or damaged.
I've always been a big wuss and cry at everything. I've always been HIGHLY annoyed at myself for doing so. I've actually gotten much better at holding them back when needed. But goodness it used to drive me NUTS! Thanks so much for making me feel better 😉
I thoroughly relate to you on this. I am from London, England and our motto is "keep a stiff upper lip" so crying was not something that was encouraged. I became more weepy too as I got older. I agree that it is a combination of things, the main one being you are now more wise as in wisdom and realize letting your emotions show is a sign of strength and is incredibly cleansing. We earn the right to cry and dog gone it we are gonna do it and relieve our souls. That's my thoughts on it. Great article, I enjoyed it!
I cry all the time – when I'm sad, happy, angry, grateful, by myself, in front of a crowd, for friends, for strangers, quietly, loudly….and then life goes on 🙂 #TeamLetItFlow
Wow, this is awesome. I am not alone! I don't know if it is always stress but stressful situations do make me cry. I even cry during sappy movies, which I never did before. Or if something tragic happens to someone in a book, or if I hear about someone's problems. My heart cries for them…. Most days I blame it on my "Dry Eye" or my sensitive eyes. Thanks for sharing this! I thought I was going crazy for a bit :/
I have accepted I'm a big crybaby. Crying is good to just let it all go.
I'm not a big crier, but I find myself crying most often when I'm by myself in the car. Sometimes I don't even know why completely. But when I do, I just let the tears flow and wonder what people riding next to me are thinking about the fact that I'm sobbing alone in my car.
I can truly attest to this. I've had my 'run to the work bathroom' to cry plenty times. Crying heals the soul. I've learned over the years to just let it flow. 🙂
I think you are so right to encourage us to cry. I am a big weenie myself and will cry over good or bad things. My kids play certain songs on the MP3 player to make me cry happy tears when I have a hard day. The only thing I do is hide away from my kids to cry over bad things. Looking at the comments, I see I am crying in good company!
When life overwhelms me I slip away into my closet and have a BIG cry. Not just any cry, but a sobbing, snot filled cry. It is a fantastic stress relief. It's been a little over a month since I have had one…
As I've gotten older I have become a big ole sap. I used to be such a hard a** and now I cry all the doggone time LOL. Sometimes you just need that release…
Oh gosh, I cry all the time it seems. I've always been emotional though, so it doesn't phase me. I do see a difference in what I cry for; while it was in stressful situations when I was younger, I tend to cry for the pain of others or in joyful situations more now.
Tears are therapeutic! I've lost count of the number of times I cried in the past year or two as I became a single mom, but I have noticed the tears have decreased. They released stress and anxiety in the beginning. And now, my tears are usually tears of joy. I tear up when I see my daughter's baby pictures and realize how quickly she's growing up. I tear up when she's away for the weekend, and I miss our quality time of building houses from Megablocks and dancing to cartoon theme songs. It's OK to cry, but not OK to wallow in sadness for too long. BTW, I LOVE joyce, listened to her this morning.