Sometimes you have to skip church. Yup you read that right. I said, sometimes you have to skip church. I know it sounds strange so let me explain.
Let me start by saying that I think church is a great place and in general I think people should go. That being said it took my years to get back to going to church and to find one where I feel comfortable. I’ve now been going to Epic church pretty regularly for over a year and a half now. But yesterday I chose to skip church. If you follow me on Instagram or Facebook than you probably think that I missed church by accident. You saw this picture of my the night before at the #SilentPhilly party (that was fun by the way) and then this before and after picture talking about how being super tired impacted my workout. It was no accident and I didn’t skip because I was tired. I chose to skip church because yesterday was Father’s Day.
Last year I wrote about how it was the first Father’s Day since I lost my dad where I was not consumed with grief. That is still true this year. Overall it was a good day and I was not sad. However, I know myself, and while the day is no longer as awful as it once was it is still a sensitive day. It is a day where I’d rather not be in a room, any room, including church, filled with dad’s being honored. As a matter of fact I avoided Facebook a little too. It can be painful to spend a specific amount of time reflecting on the huge whole left in my life by my dad’s absence. So I’d rather not do that, especially not on Father’s day, a day that was fun for him and me when we shared it together.
So I skipped church as a way to protect my heart and my emotions. I skipped church so that I could have a joyful day instead of one shadowed by a cloud of grief. I chose to skip church as an act of self love and self care. Now I did not completely ignore the day. I did look for and post a picture of my dad on Facebook that I’d not previously shared. I also sent Happy Father’s Day text to a couple of friends who are also dad’s. So don’t mistake my skipping church as a way for me to be in denial about the holiday. I simply need to do what was best for me to stay joyful and not go to a dark place.
P. S the services are recorded so I will be checking out the message later this week.
So what do you think? Was I wrong for skipping church? Have you ever intentionally skipped church? Have you ever skipped on Father’s or Mother’s Day?
If ever there needed to be a reason to skip church, that would be a good one. I have issues with accolades, so I don’t like to be in church on mother’s day. Moms stand up.. all that type of thing… I don’t love the attention, so if I can manage to skip it, I do.
Sometimes I stay home form worship services just to be able to have some alone time and not feel added pressure to not bring my bad mood to anyone else.
I try really hard not to skip church on Sunday’s but we have weeknight services that sometimes I miss. I feel off during the week if I miss Sunday. That’s just me though.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with your reasoning for skipping church. Sometimes you just have to take car of yourself.
You have my condolences.
It’s ok, it what’s in your heart. Just because of you don’t make into church doesn’t mean your not spiritual.
Girl no, nobody can tell you what is right or wrong for you. Self-preservation is a very real and necessary thing.
Kudos to you for living life on your own terms, I’m always about that life.
I don’t think you were wrong at all!! You have to listen to your internal barometer.
Girl no, nobody can tell you what is right or wrong for you. Self preservation is a very real and necessary thing.
Kudos to you for living life on your own terms, I’m always about that life.
I don’t think you were wrong for skipping church. I rarely go. You needed a day and I don’t see a problem with that. Especially with such a difficult holiday. Anyone should understand that.
I think we have to focus more on self. If self is saying skip, skip. You are no good to anyone if you are a mess.
Amen sister! I did the same thing. It’s been 9 years (this Sept) since I lost my Dad and celebrating Father’s day is still a touchy issue for me. I think both Mother’s & Father’s day will be. But we must do what’s best for us!
I totally understand where you’re coming from. I’m glad you were honest with yourself to do what was best for you!
Sometimes you have to skip church, work,and school. Self care is so important. No apology or explanation needed!
Taking a break from church for the day is no crime in my opinion. I am glad that you were able to maintain your joy and still catch the sermon online.