There are times when life is really hard and out of control. You may have a sick relative, trouble at work, difficulties with your spouse, bill collectors that won’t stop calling, feel lonely, or any other sad circumstance in your life. During these times we may feel helpless and out of control, like life is happening to us. This is the feeling I hate the most. I felt a lot like this the other week when my mom was sick. I felt helpless and like I could not control anything. However, at some point I did have an epiphany. I realized that no matter what was going on in my life there are a few things that I have complete control of.
Focusing on what you can control when life is putting you through the ringer will help you keep it together until more joyful times return. Here are 4 things that are within your control even when life is kicking your tail.
- What goes in your mouth. Emotional eating is a real thing. In general it is not a good thing and can lead to weight gain and an unhealthy relationship with food. However, when things around you are making you feel like you have no say in anything in your life. Deciding to have that favorite treat can help. Or an even better option would be remembering that you can have complete control of the quality of the food you eat and choosing something that will not only make you feel good but be good for you.
- Your spiritual practice. There are no circumstances or situations in life that you cannot pray about. It does not cost you any money and very little time. You can multi-task even. I have prayed while walking, driving, eating, showering, etc… You can even ask other to pray with or for you. Prayer can give you a calming feeling and having other’s pray for you can help you remember that you are not alone. I find prayers thanking God for all of the good things that are happening helps me remember that not everything is bad because. For example when my mom was in the hospital I routinely thanked God for allowing me to be able to be there with her, that I lived so close to the hospital, and that my car was working to take me back and forth. Those gratitude remanded me that God was still working even during the difficult time.
- Your thoughts. This can be a hard one. I struggle to control my thoughts and keep them joyful. It is a struggle but it is possible and I am getting better at it. One method I use is when I have worrisome thoughts is to tell myself that it is not time to think about that yet and focus on something else. I may have to do it multiple times though but practice makes perfect. Another method I use is distraction. For me this comes in the form of Netflix, YouTube, candy crush, Sudoku, reading blogs, and doing anything that will take my mind off of stressful things.
- How you look. When thing are not going well it may feel silly or even shallow to focus on your appearance. But making sure your clothes and hair are neat and clean can go along way towards making you feel better. Add a little blush or putting on your favorite color can give you a bigger boost. It may sound shallow but there are times when being able to say at least I look cute may be the thing that keeps you going.
I hope you don’t find yourself in a situation where you feel life is just happening to you any time soon. However if you do focus on the few things that you can control and make the best of those choices. What are some things you focus on when life gets super stressful? What things do yo feel are always within your control regardless of what else is going on in your life?
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download says
Appreciate this post. Will try it out.
Kimberly H. Smith says
Thanks Arlett for sharing this on Traffic Jam Weekend! I pinned it and am featuring it on this weekend's party.
Luxe Tips says
This is such an important post to share. I agree that prayer is a great way to get through difficult times.
debdenny says
Sometimes it is hard to maintain control. Just stay positive.
Melinda says
tjose are great tips. this post comes at a really great time
Ann B says
These are great tips. When life gets me down i like to change up my look. I will go and get a totally different hairstyle. It always makes me feel better.
Christie C says
Ha, what goes in and what comes out of the mouth, so very true! Control is a tough thing to swallow 🙂
Rachelle J says
These are such wonderful things to keep in mind when life gets a little crazy. I can sometime fall victim to emotional eating, but I try to keep a grasp on it.
Six Time Mommy TEST says
So true, LOVE this! I hate when things are a little crazy in life so I always have to keep things in control. This stuff I can work on. Great reminder. – Jeanine
Crystal says
Seeing my parents grow older has been challenging. There's so much I want to do for them, but can't. These are perfectly timed reminders.
Penelope says
Those are wonderful reminders. I try to focus on what I can control when life throws me a curve ball. It helps to keep me grounded also.
Tracey says
This is so wise. I am taking these tips to heart. Things have been a bit wacky for me and I so needed to see this post today.
Pam says
I always like getting a new hair cut or something like that when I´m really going through emotional turmoil. It just makes you feel better.
Cheap Is The *New* Classy says
These certainly are all things you can control. I have a bad habit of emotional eating.
Masshole Mommy says
I have a major issue with emotional eating. I try, but it really does make me feel better to pig out sometimes.
Tracy Iglesias says
It's funny Dr. Oz show was focusing on Meditation today and I realized I hadn't done it in awhile. I took some time to Meditate today and that is another way to help stay focused when things feel like they are going awry!
Tracy @ Ascending Butterfly
Kristi says
Some great reminders and suggestions. Sometimes life just gets in the way and we needs reminders on how we can enjoy it.
Melissa Pezza says
Taking control of the little things in a traumatic situation can help you hold on to your sanity. Thanks for sharing this!
Liz Mays says
Looking clean and neat definitely makes a big difference. I feel really energetic when I'm wearing nice clothes.
Cat says
This is a great reminder. I get stressed and I want to eat junk food. I really need to work on eating better when life throws me curve balls. Catherine S
Stacie @ Divine Lifestyle says
I love this so much! We may not be able to control the firestorm of craziness going on around us, but we can control little things to help us keep an even keel.
PalmTrees SeaBreeze says
All very good tips to take to heart. I hope your mom is feeling better now.
Joyce MommyTalkShow says
I've vowed to do better with my appearance. When you work from home, it's easy to slip into the t-shirt and jogging pants routine. Then I wonder why I don't feel my best.
Even today for kindergarten drop off I put on my BB cream, lip gloss and mascara.
MJ Jacks says
I've been emotional eating for the last 5-6 weeks. I am ready for a change along with getting back to my morning routine of prayer and meditation. This mama needs to be healthy physically and mentally for myself and my family.
Sasha-Shae says
It's always great to be in control of the things we can control. Thanks for sharing this reminder.
Nicole says
Thanks for the reminder! When life is a drab the above mentioned areas can make it feel worse if not in order n
Christine St Vil says
I think controlling our thoughts is one of the hardest things to do, especially when things aren't going so well. Thank you for sharing these great reminders!
~BernettaStyle~ says
Thank you for these tips! It really makes you think about your actions for sure!
Chele Von says
Amazing post! I really appreciate the tips you shared in this post. Very helpful!
Camesha | Mama Motivator says
Yes! And it's when you focus on those things that you can control that you begin to re-gain control of everything else.
Jinxy and Me says
That is so true! When it feels like everything is out of control, actually taking control of what is possible to control can be empowering.
Aimee Fauci says
When life gets super stressful I am not very strong. Instead of following your list above I normally go the opposite and stress and get in a slump.
Siobhan BeFree Project says
I appreciate the tips you shared that we have control of. I'm a firm believer that no matter how you feel, get dressed. Don't let the word see how you feel inside. Show up at all times.
Lori Gunn says
The bills seem to be building up lately, which stresses me out. I've made a calendar of which company to speak to on which day. If they won't work with me, I write down their name, tell them thank you, and call back to talk to someone else. I agree with praying. Thanks for the very good guidance.
Kita says
I sometimes feel like I can't control my thoughts. Sometimes it's all over the place and I am such a worry wart. I worry about everything when I know that I shouldn't. I feel like I can control my smile. It's up to me to not sit there and dwell. I always say dwell for a moment then get up and keep your mind busy.
Rachee says
I will admit that since I have been taking a little more care with my appearance I feel a bit more confident about myself. I love the way I look and feel. When life gets super stressful I take a walk. I've been walking a lot.
Yulunda G. says
Thank you for the encouragement via this post as it has been one of those kinda year's. Not for me, but for some very close friends of mine. You name it, it probably happened. But, we are steadfast believers and are remaining encouraged.
Like you said, "Prayer can give you a calming feeling and having other's pray for you can help you remember that you are not alone."
I too have to use distraction to control my thoughts. I believe this is one of the toughest challenges for humans period.
When I went through my horrible bout's with depression (Thank God for deliverance), I always looked good and was still getting my hair "did!"
Happy Friday!