Chasing Joy

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Feel Good Friday – Week in Review

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Friday Yay!!!
How fast this week has gone. Are you Feeling Good??? I hope you all have fun and exciting plans for the weekend. Before you get all busy with your plans, in the spirit of Feel Good Friday let’s take a moment to reflect on the good things that happened this week.

  • Top of my list is BP stopping the oil leak!!! About damn time.

  • The Boys & Girls Clubs of America will earn more than $2.5 million (with another up-to-$1 million matched by James’ sponsor Nike) from the Lebron James announcement. – Link

  • 70,000 Gulf Sea Turtle’s will be saved from the oil – Link

  • Philadelphia and partners of NeighborWorks America announced a campaign to fight against foreclosure bailout scams. FYI if you think you or someone you know may have been scammed here are the contact numbers. …Save Your Home Philly hotline number = 215-334-HOME (4663), The national hotline = 1-800-995-HOPE (4673) –Link

  • New Jersey is getting closer to legalizing medical marijuana. (I know any news related to legalizing weed will make some of you feel good) – Link

  • “Lose the Training Wheels” camp is coming to Philadelphia. The camp helps Special Needs Children learn to bike ride without training wheels. I LOVE THIS!!! – Link

In addition to things in the news there were several personal things that made me feel good this week.

  • Saturday – playing with my friend’s new puppy and all the babies at her nephew’s b-day party. Nothing makes you smile like babies, puppies, and kittens (shame there were no kittens at the party but then I guess that would have been a bit much 🙂

  • Sunday – not running into a few people I’d rather not see while having Chinese food (Real Chinese food not the American version of it. The kind Asian people eat. No chicken and broccoli, or General Tso in sight) in their neighborhood.

  • Monday – Setting a new personal best by jogging 30 min on the treadmill. I will get to those 3 miles (see Devil’s Workshop)

  • Tuesday – Book Club always makes me feel good. I also made a decision on how to handle a situation that had been weighing heavily on me.

  • Wednesday – I won the weight loss challenge at my job this week. I have the crown until next Wednesday when it goes to the new winner. What if I win two weeks in a row???

  • Thursday – Zumba I always have fun in there, despite the pain.

  • Every day this week – The voting started for the Miss Curve 2011 contest. (Link) I am a contestant. Every day friends have been voting for me, leaving the nicest comments about me, texting, emailing, and facbooking me with well wishes and messages of support. Also, my virtual trainer blogged about me. Everyone’s support has made me feel so special. It is so wonderful to be reminded of who is in your corner.

What made you feel good this past week??? Please share so we all can feel good along with you.

Feel Good Friday – Feel Good Food

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Happy Friday!!!

At my job we are doing a weight lost competition. It is very friendly and motivational. Not as serious as some of you doing biggest loser type competitions for money. Since, I have been trying to make healthy changes in an effort to truly treat my body as my temple; the competition is right on time. So in the spirit of weight loss and healthy eating here is a list (I know how much you love my lists) of healthy foods that also make you Feel Good.

• Blueberries – Have some when stressed. They have vitamin C, which is what your body uses as fuel when your heart is racing. They also have antioxidants, which repair and protect your body from the effects of stress. • Almonds – Reach for these when you feel panicky. Almonds keep your heart from racing when panic attacks. They help lower your blood pressure and keep oxygen flowing throughout the body. • Spinach – Remember how Popeye reached for these before a fight? Well in addition to giving him strength spinach was good for his stress. It has loads of Magnesium, which is a mineral that helps keep you in a calm state.• Milk – Is good for when you are feeling restless. The calcium can help you feel more tranquil. Just be sure to go for low or fat free. Also watch your portion stick to about 8 oz to decrease the likely hood of negative digestive side effects.• Banana –Go for this perfectly packaged fruit to help you relax. The potassium it packs helps reduce tension. • Brown Rice –This healthy carb helps improve concentration.• Figs – Having tummy trouble? Figs help you digestive system work better and prevents stomach pains. Just be careful not to eat too many they can make your digestive system work too fast, if you know what I mean ;-)• Eggs – Keep your thinking cap running at full power. Eggs have b vitamins which enable nerve cells to burn glucose, the energy source of the brain. • Spices (such as Rosemary) – These flavor boosters may reduce stork and Alzheimer’s risk. They also decrease our dependency on salt.• Pop corn – it’s not just for movie time. Popcorn boosts your energy and is just plain fun. Just be careful with the butter flavor.• Coffee – A cup of this in the morning is not such a bad idea. Moderate amount increases mental and physical performance. Everyone is different so experiment to see how much will work for you and still let you sleep at night.• Hot cocoa – Perhaps as a liquid dessert? Unprocessed, natural, non-dutched cocoa lowers blood pressure, lifts your mood and helps you sleep.• Water – I’m sure we all know water is good for you but it actually helps you feel good and look good too. Good old H2O helps improve mood, motor function, mind power, skin problems, and a host of other maladies.

If you want to read more on these foods check out the following sites where I got my info:
http://www.articlesbase.com/alternative-medicine-articles/10-happy-foods-fight-depression-fatigue-naturally-136750.html#ixzz0qWDnpU6Q

http://health.slides.kaboose.com/113-feel-good-foods-10-stress-soothers http://feel-good-food.blogspot.com/

http://health.msn.com/health-topics/alzheimers-disease/slideshow.aspx?cp-documentid=100253640&imageindex=9&q=Raid+the+Spice+Rack

http://health.msn.com/health-topics/depression/slideshow.aspx?cp-documentid=100150090

http://www.articlesbase.com/alternative-medicine-articles/10-happy-foods-fight-depression-fatigue-naturally-136750.html

I know the weekends are tempting to be care free and eat all kinds of junk and drink too much so keep in mind these feel good foods and eat joyfully.

The Temple’s Foundation

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In my previous post My Body My Temple…Or My Body My Minimally Maintained Shelter??? I talked about how my quest for Joy would be futile if I did not take care of my body. If I’m tired, out of shape, and malnourished I’ll never be able to grasp joy. If I’m only doing the minimum instead of treating my body as a temple I will not have the energy to spend time with friends or work on my goals nor the confidence to try new things because I’ll know I’m not at my best.

I already laid out my blueprints – regular exercise, fruit, veggies, whole grains, low fat protein, water, sleep, and support/ inspiration. Now I have started to build my foundation. The foundation of my future temple consists of four basics – fitness, food, sleep, and support.

Fitness – I am working on being more active in general. At work I make sure I get up from my desk every few hours and take a walk through the building. When the weather is nice I take a little walk at lunch. I’m also going to the gym. I make sure I get in some jogging and weight training every week. The most exciting part of my fitness routine is Zumba. Zumba is floor aerobics to Latin music with Latin dance moves mixed in. It is challenging but also really fun. This is the first exercise that I have actually liked.

Food – It has been said that weight loss is 80% diet and 20% exercise. I believe this is true in my case. I have always worked out but I’ve also always been overweight and always struggled with my eating. I have 30 years of eating habits that need to change. I grew up eating three big meals and snacks. I’m trying to change this to smaller meals and snacks. My plate almost always had a green veggie on it growing up, but the veggie was the smallest portion and the meat the largest. I’d like to keep the green veggies but make them the biggest portion and make meat and carbs smaller. I grew up eating snack cakes and candy daily. I want these to be rare treats. So I have quite a few changes to make. Now I plan my meals and snacks ahead of time. I eat way more fruit and veggies now than ever before. I am drinking lots of water and only diet soda. I also am challenging myself to give up pastries and candy for a few months to break that habit. More than anything all of these changes with food require me to change the way I think about it. To think about how the food is really making me feel and decide I deserve to feel better and that requires better fuel.

Support – This is where it helps to be open. I hate the Food Police. I get real annoyed real quick when someone says “should you eat that” or “I thought you were on a diet”. I never like being told what to do anyway and this just pushes my buttons. So in the past I have shied away from telling people that I was watching my weight or trying to change habits. However, lately I’ve been more open and I have realized that more people will actually be supportive than try to be food police. Many people have stopped offering me unhealthy treats and make a point of telling me about good healthy recipes. I also get a lot of support and inspiration on the internet. There are so many resources – articles, diet and exercise groups and personal blogs dedicated to health and fitness. The groups can be especially helpful they often allow you to be open about your feelings in an anonymous way and get real feedback from people going through similar things. You can also find all kinds of interesting workouts and menus online.

Sleep – This is the big crack in my foundation. It is common knowledge that the average adult needs 6 to 8 hours of sleep (really closer to 8). I’m only averaging 5 during the week. This is not good. I suffer every morning when the alarm goes off. I know my body is not working at the optimal level because it is tired. I also know I would not get so sleepy in the afternoon at work if I had enough sleep at night. As a kid I never wanted to go to bed and I’ve obviously not matured in this area. I always feel there is one more show to watch, chapter to read, Facebook status to update, website to visit, etc, etc, etc…. Even as I write this I realize how silly it is. All of these things will be there in the morning. I have been working on this foundation flaw. I realize how this crack can spread to the other areas. Sleepy people do not work out, at least not with intensity, and they also tend to make poor choices opting to grab anything that will give them an instant energy (sugar) boost. I will seal up this crack in time and find a way to do all I need/want to do and still get my 8 hours beauty rest. Sleepy people are not joyful.

Like any construction project I have a schedule. Here is what my next 12 weeks of foundation building look like:

w 1 – say good bye to the vending machine
w 2 – drink a gallon of water a day
w 3 – go to bed by 12:00 during the week
w 4 – do fasted cardio once a week
w 5 – 2 salads a week
w 6 – clean/organize house 15 min every day (for time management and getting to bed earlier)
w 7 – walk/jog outside at least 1 time a week
w 8 – jog, weight train, zumba, and wii fit every week
w 9 – write down everything I eat
w 10 – track in spark people
w 11 – focus on calories – less than 2000
w 12 -3 veggies a day

I am excited to put my blueprints into action and build a healthy foundation for Joy.

Chasing Joy onthe tInternational day of happiness

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Do you struggle with feelings of anxiety even when they are happy?  Let’s work together to overcome this for International Day of Happiness.Today is International day of happiness!

I have been living the spirit of the day for a while now.  I have been really happy yall!  The crazy part is just typing that out makes me feel anxious.  Like I am going to jinx it or something.  Then I have to remind myself that I don’t believe in jinx  I believe in God who has great plans for me.

The reason I continue to write Chasing Joy after all of these years is because it can be hard to be happy.  Even when things are going well, and I actually feel happy, it is a struggle.  At my happiest moments there is a little dark cloud in the back of my mind saying whoa don’t get too happy. Remember what happened before.  That little cloud is the aftermath of trauma.

I am all about counting my blessings but that dark cloud makes me think back on all that I experienced between ages 29 and 37.  I won’t go into detail, it is International Day of Happiness after all. But these are things like losing my parents, miscarriage, heart break, and infertility.  These are all things I’ve talked about before.  I was definitely experiencing a period of loss.  Now I am in a period of harvest.  Unfortunately dread of that season ending surfaces in my happiest moments.

That is when I have to kick my positive self-talk into over drive.  I remind myself that yes all things change. My season of loss has changed into a season of harvest. It will change again so I need to be in this moment.  I need to stay in the present and enjoy the happiness that I am feeling.  Don’t look back.  Don’t dread the future.  Be happy now.  Smile now. Laugh now. Dance now.  Kiss and hug Baby Joy Chaser NOW!!!!  Then I count my blessings and focus on everything that is going right, right now!

Life is full of ups and downs. Challenging and uneventful times.  If you are in a period of Harvest enjoy it focus on it and stay present in the moment.  If you are in a period of loss know that the hard times will indeed pass.  Be kind to yourself.  Lean on your support system. Keep Chasing joy.

Does anyone else struggle with feelings of anxiety even when they are happy?  How do you cope?  How do you stay present?  Let’s work together to overcome this.

Happy International Day of Happiness

How To Recover From Or Get Over A Breakup

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How To Recover From Or Get Over A BreakupValentine’s Day is this week.  It is a lovely holiday for expressing love for others and it is especially nice if you have a BAE, you know a significant other.  But that is not the case for many of us.  I am very much single but it’s ok because I have been single for a while and know how to still have an awesome Valentine’s day.  Unfortunately I know some of you may not just be single but may be newly single as in fresh out of a breakup.  I know Valentine’s day may be the last thing you want to read about right now.  So instead of discussing Valentine’s Day let’s talk about the best ways to recover from or get over a breakup.

So it has been a while since I went through and official breakup.  Actually my last official break up sent me to therapy.  LOL  Okay there were other things happening at the same time that also lead me to therapy, not just the breakup.  Since then I have dated some guys and had crushes that didn’t work out and while those are not the same as an official breakup I have had some bruised feelings and what not.  How I got over those situations and break ups in the past was by confiding in friends and family members that I trust, working out, and staying busy.  A time or two I even started new a new meal plan and lost some weight.  That can be an awesome confidence builder after a breakup.

I decided to reach out to my friends on social media to see what they had to say about ways to recover from or get over a breakup.  Lot’s of the advice centered around self-care which makes perfect sense.  When you are feeling sad or disappointed is the perfect time to be kind to and take extra care of yourself.  Other’s advised getting introspective.  This also makes a lot of sense because we can learn a lot about ourselves from our dating and relationship experiences.  There were also several responses that mentioned turning to God.  This is also great advice.  The reason I consider Faith to be a Pillar of Joy is because when we go through hard times, like a breakup it is helpful to be able to turn to our Faith for support and comfort.

Here are a few of the responses to my questions on Facebook and Instagram.

I ask myself five major questions, was this person for me? How did he make me feel? Did I see this relationship going somewhere? What were the things that bothered me about this person? Why did we break up? Once I have finished dealing with my own stuff, I then deal with my spiritual stuff, which is no good thing will GOD withhold from me! That means that this person was not GOD’S best for me and I refuse to settle for anything.  ~ Michelle 

Time and prayer. No magic bullet ~ Herman

A good cry, prayer, some retail therapy and some ultimate me time ( mani, pedi, massage etc.) ~ Dominique

OMG! This last 1 required me to spiritually break a stronghold. I started getting up at 5:30 in the morning for a prayer call. I still do it to this day over 18 months later. I would say the stronghold broke after about 6 weeks of really just seeking God. Of course cleansing through crying helped too. I re-launched an old business and started rediscovering myself ~ Meredith of Maurita’s Essentials

I try to stay present and appreciate the people around me. I treat myself to something nice. I reflect on what I learned about myself through that relationship and adjust my standards list. I give my self a few weeks or months (depending in relationship length) to grieve the death of the relationship and I look for something positive to replace it like an exercise or cooking class. I also may try to complete something on my bucket list. I also might change my hairstyle or something:) ~ Veronica

My thoughts have to do with seeking “closure” after a breakup. Entertainer Steve Harvey often talks about women seeking closure from men who are not willing or able to provide it. My take on closure is that what we are actually looking for is answers to questions about ourselves that have likely been lurking around for a long time. The problem is that we are looking for those answers outside of ourselves rather than doing the work of self-examination. An example of such a question might be, “Do I have worth or value?” This question, when asked of one’s self, can lead to an exploration of life experiences that have either contributed to, or detracted from, one’s sense of their own worth. From here, any healing work that needs to take place can begin . . . . ~ Leslie of Leslie Glass & Associates

 

 

With Doritos, Jalapeño Cheddar Cheetos, red juice drinks, and romantic comedies. ~ @WritterChanelle of Writer Chanelle

I workout a bunch, dolly up, and make them so regret it! Their loss not mine! ~@kierankull

Pamper me, workout out, enjoy chocolate and laugh at their foolishness! ~ @cocoamommy1 of Cocoa Mommy

Cry, sulk, eat ice cream….plenty of ice cream, kickboxing, hanging out with good friends, shopping, throwing darts at his picture, throwing away or burning all his crap, get a promotion or a degree or an advanced degree. ~@gracefully.yours

Travel! Catch flights not feelings! Lol. ~ @asskicker.in.training

I cried for two days and then did a massive clean out of the house. I made sure there was nothing of his in my home. Gave it all to him and then brought a new lounge and bedroom furniture. I felt a little better then. ~ @hopeforafuture

Exercise, Pray & Love Yourself ? ~ @classysharelle of ClassySharelle.com

I think these guys gave some awesome advice on how to recover from or get over a breakup!!!

I know with Valentine’s Day being this week there will be an increased focus on romantic love and relationships.  If you are in the midst of or recovering from a breakeup I hope you found the advice above helpful.  Go do something nice for yourself.  Practice some self-care, work on your goals, and rely on your faith.   It will get better.

What is your advice for anyone going through a break up right now?

P.S. Make sure you are following me on Facebook and Instagram so you can give your feedback the next time I do a little crowd sourcing. 🙂

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back In This IVF Journey

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Two steps forward, one step back.  That is what this trying to conceive journey turned IVF journey is like.  As soon as I think things are looking up and that I am making progress something goes wrong. Then I have to take a step back.  My hard work payed off.  I made my weightloss goal and followed my Estrogen Priming protocol in time to get started with the IVF stimulation drug before the holidays. Of Course, something had to go wrong.  Check out this week’s baby making update video to find out what went wrong and why I am taking a step back.

How I Embrace My Shape

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How I Embrace My ShapeI have been overweight since 5th grade.  Needless to say I have tried many many many times to lose weight.  If you have been reading this blog for a while you can likely remember several posts where I talk about diet changes, exercise, hypnosis, etc…  Ultimately I have not yet been successful.  But it’s ok.  It’s ok because I haven’t given up on it.  It is ok because I love myself and embrace my shape.

Now I will admit that I don’t love myself and embrace my shape every moment of every day.  I have good days and bad days.  I have looked in the mirror and seen every flaw and other times I have looked in the mirror and been super happy with myself.  Last week I found out about the Body Challenge Detox.  The challenge is for us to focus on self-love and acceptance.  I like the idea  of the challenge because I realize that without loving, accepting, and embracing myself I may not ever overcome my challenges with weight.  Perhaps I have not loved myself enough in the past to make the changes that I have needed to make.

How I Embrace My Shape

Me and my mom before I left for my 10th grade dance. Notice the sheer jacket I am wearing. My dress had spaghetti straps and I insisted on wearing something that would cover my arms.

The first day of the challenge asked the participants to do a video about how we embrace our shape.  You may have seen a clip of my embrace my shape video on my Instagram.  Below is the full video.  Before you watch it here is a little background.  I did not start to worry about my weight until 6th grade. That was the year when a doctor first suggested I go on a diet and the first time I remember being teased by classmates about my weight.  Since then my weight has been ever present in my mind.

Overall I have and still like my body shape I have just wished it was smaller.  But there were times when I kind of focused on certain body parts to not only dislike but to be ashamed of.  For years I would not wear any kind of sleeveless or tank top.  I always wanted my upper arms covered.  Then there was a time when I’d wear capri pants but not shorts.  The thighs have always been an area of concerned.  Over the years I have let go of these fashion restrictions and I very seldomly even think about these “problem areas”.  When answering the question on how I embrace my shape for the Body Challenge Detox I realized I far I have come.

Check out the video below on how I embrace my shape.

Search the hashtag #BodyChallengeDetox and follow @CurvyGirl_Chronicles on Instagram.

Do you have self-imposed fashion rules that you follow because of your problem areas?  Did you in the past? How do you embrace your shape?  Will you take part in the Body Detox Challenge?

Lunch Would Be More Joyful If My Salad Smelled Like Cake

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Does your salad have a smell?  I’m not talking about the salmon, chicken, or dressing that you put on it.  I’m talking about the lettuce and veggies.  Do they have a smell?

Well mine doesn’t and that’s the problem.  OK if I lean in really close to my salad I can smell something. What it does not smell like is stew, pizza, or a pot pie.  Why oh why can’t my salad smell like fried chicken?  LOL  I know you are wondering what I am talking about.

I have always struggled with my weight.  I have written about it many times before.  It is an on going battle.  Since starting my journey towards becoming a mom the battle has intensified.  The stress of the two week wait and the disappointment of the IUI not working has not been good for my eating habits.  I have been trying to get back on track by focusing more on my nutrition to increase my fertility odds.  I have been trying to eat more lean protein, calcium, and vitamin C.

In this spirit I brought a salad into work yesterday for lunch. But what happens about 15 minutes before its time for my salad?  My co-workers start warming up their left over pasta, opening up their take out containers, and bringing back slices of pizza from one of the celebrations that seem to take place every other day.

Their food smells so good.  My salad is suddenly the last thing I want.  I want something warm and fragrant and savory.  Yesterday I weakened and got a cup of soup to go with my salad.  But more often than I’d like to admit I give in, abandon my salad, and get something much less nutritious yet much more satisfying.

All of this could be avoided if only my salad had a smell, a smell like cake, Chinese food, or bacon.

Do you have to deal with this problem at your job?  How do you stick to your healthy meal when the unhealthy stuff around you smells so good?.

There Are Great Things To Come & Other Joyful Affirmations

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What do you think of affirmations?  Do you do them? Have you had positive response to them?

I like the ideas of affirmations but I don’t really have much experience with them. A couple weeks ago I was saying 10 affirmations several times a day for the Pinterest Project.  I have tried to keep it up with them but I have not been doing it daily anymore.  Other than 1 of the affirmations making me smile I have not yet had any real positive response to them.  My thoughts are that I need to do them longer and I also need to pick affirmations that are more personal.

The only affirmation that I have used at different times since I was in college was “To Blessed To Be Stressed”  I don’t know where I first heard or read it but I remember saying it repeatedly when I could not sleep before a big test in college and a different times when I felt stressed.  I’d like to find a few more to say regularly.

Here are a few of my own.

  • I am enough. Smart enough, pretty enough, kind enough, and brave enough.  
  • There are great things to come.
  • My future is bright.
  • God has a plan for me that is greater than anything I can imagine.
  • It is OK to make mistakes.  God is there to catch me when I fall. 
  • I eat right and exercise to be my ideal weight.
Here are a few I found online.  

Get Check-ups & Heath Insurance To Be Happy and Healthy in 2015.

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Happy Monday!

Today is the first #MakeitHappenMonday of 2015.  I know we are all knee deep in our resolutions and and goals for the new year.  Most of our goals in some way tie back to us being happier and healthier, they do go hand and hand.  We want to be more drink more water,  get more sleep, become more fit, lose weight, etc…Those are all great things but what I want to encourage you to add to your #MakeitHappenMonday goals this week are health goals that include making doctor’s appointments and looking into and  signing up for health insurance if you don’t already have it.

Its only Jan 5th and I’ve already crossed off one unpleasant doctor’s appointment from my list.  I went to the eye doctor on Friday, 20/20 baby!. If you follow me on Instagram you know I am relieved.  I was terrified and now I don’t have to go back for a year.  I already have an appointment scheduled to check out my lady parts later this month.  Lastly, one of my #MakeitHappenMonday goals for this week is to make an appointment for the dentist.  Luckily I can focus on my health and these appointments without much financial worry because I have health insurance.

If you don’t have health insurance, now is the time to look into getting coverage.  Now I am in no way an expert on health coverage but what I am an expert on is making lists, yall know I love making lists. So below is a list of resources (including videos) from United Health Care all about health insurance.

Our happiness and our health are deeply intertwined.  It’s hard to feel Joyful when we are not feeling healthy.  Now is the time to make our health a priority in 2015. Make those doctor’s appointments and get yourself health insurance if you don’t already have it. I hope these resourced are helpful. Visit United Health Care for even more valuable resources.

What are your goals for #MakeitHappenMonday?  Have you added making important doctor’s appointments to the list?  Do you need to get health insurance first?  Did you add get health insurance to your goals for 2015 and start researching health insurance to your #MakeitHappenMonday list for this week?  Which of the above videos did you like most or find the most helpful?

This is a sponsored Post. Zig Marketing has provided me with compensation for this post about Untied Health Care’s heath insurance information resources. However, all thoughts and opinions expressed herein are my own.

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